Monday, December 7, 2009

Arousal of the Kundalini or something else?

I've had some uncomfortable emotional issues and reactions in the last few days...is it at all possible that the practice of Bound Lotus is arousing the Kundalini energy? In Lee Sanella's "Kundalini - Psychosis or Transcendance", he documents several 'sensations and happenings' around the arousal of Kundalini. I've had the tingling and throbbing in the mooladhara chakra area; I've heard the internal sounds before, though it was many years ago; and currently the changes in thought processes he describes, the detachment and dissociation, and the extreme emotions most of all are happening.

Today alone has been extremely wierd. I taught at 6:15 am, then went home to get some work, then to get my hair trimmed, did laundry, and then my aunt called. She made me very uncomfortable. Among other things, the fact that I am Hindu makes her uncomfortable. I felt like what I said just didn't matter to her. I felt lost in way. My only family I'm really close to is my father,and I would have liked to have been close to her. I got off the phone and sat in Bound Lotus anyway, and it was there that I began to dissociate. Time disappeared for me.

Later, at the chiropractor's, I felt very strange and very emotional. The therapist asked me where I was. She helped me come back. It would make sense why I was crying uncontrollably after my aunt's callousness, when I'd left myself vulnerable and raw, but just disappearing mentally? I'm six days away from having completed 40 days - the time it takes to break an old habit. Something tells me this is, in some ways, harder than a 90-day or 1000-day practice. 6 days? I'm more than a little freaked. I don't want to just disappear on people. It looks a little psychotic, and more than a little unprofessional.

1 comment:

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