I feel like Cinderella in so many ways...

...not the least of which is trying to beat the clock to get home and finish Bound Lotus again so I don't turn into a pumpkin, or have to watch the glass slippers on my tiny feet turn into worn silk slippers with holes. 95 days and counting. Only 905 more. This means sometime in 2013, I believe, is when I'll finish. I haven't done all the math for that, but I have for how it will change and has changed my life. Yesterday I told a creepy stalker type who was pestering me inappropriately for a private yoga session to essentially fuck off. Not in so many words. I was acerbically polite. Today, I was privvy to the knowledge that, yet again, apartment employees have been judging not only my past, but trying to recreate it in the future, ignoring who I am now. With a little help from my friends, and a caring boss, I've resolved to write these high-school-minded, bored, gossipy people off as the miserable, unhappy, jealous, unfulfilled and pathetic people they are. If they want to be miserable let them be. I refuse to join them anymore just because they want to pull me down into the pot where they are boiling alive in misery and regret for lost dreams. They'll need to do more than call me crazy, or a witch, just because I used to be an alcoholic and drug addict who was seething with 100 times more bitterness than I've experienced in recent years, or because I leave the house sometimes with a turban on to do Kundalini Yoga. Their pathetic, uneducated, untraveled Midwestern, and closed-minded attitudes rival the jealousy at my happiness. If they want to be miserable can I really stop them?

Yes I know I'm a duck out of water here, and every cool person I ever meet leaves St. Louis. I plan on doing so myself one day. I'm a hippy-chick just passing through. I plan on traveling and teaching, moving nearby some large body of water such as the ocean, in a warm climate, with a kind lover or partner and enough money to live comfortably and hopefully pay back my benefactors who've literally saved my life with their help. I plan on dancing with the sunrise tomorrow to celebrate this goal. Most of all, as I sit again, I want to have a heart big enough to hold even the bastards who make me sad.